Our 40th wedding anniversary celebration started with bickering. Was the entire weekend doomed?
My husband and I like each other and have a good time together, but during the long weekend celebration in Charleston, SC, I noticed we were bickering quite a bit. It left a bad taste in my mouth. I didn’t like the feel of this rancor and wanted to do something about it.
I was about to say, “We’re arguing with each other a lot.” Instead, and thankfully, at the last moment, I switched the focus to myself. “I notice I’m arguing with you a lot. I’m sorry about that. I’m going to try to do better.”
Bill said, “I was thinking the same thing about myself. I’m sorry too.”
The adage, “Let it begin with me,” had come to my rescue.
It took a while for each of us to adjust our attitudes before the mild bickering dissolved. Eventually we got back on track and enjoyed ourselves and each other’s company. The rest of the weekend went smoothly.
That slogan, “Let it begin with me,” is a good one.
Is my behavior completely irreproachable?
Anytime I’m feeling resentful or irritated with someone, I can take an emotional pause and reflect on my own behavior instead of someone else’s. Is my behavior completely irreproachable? If not, then I need to make an attitude adjustment and correct my ways. It keeps the focus on me, which is the only person I can change.
A dose of humility goes a long way towards harmony.
That’s a smart thing to remember because no one is perfect. And why would you want the burden of perfection anyway? Accepting my own faults makes it easier to forgive someone for having theirs.
We had a lovely 40th wedding anniversary celebration. As long as we each continue to treat ourselves and each other like this, I wouldn’t mind spending another 40 years together.